My 39th Birthday Yesvember

So, there is this amazing lady in my life who has taken it upon herself to create a movement called YesVember.  Each day in November, she posts a challenge of something to say YES to…the challenge is to actually say yes and do it. 

As the universe would have it, on the day of my 39^th birthday, here is the challenge:

            Think about a great memory from the last year. If you’ve had a rough year, go back two years, or five even if you have to. When you decide what that memory is, spend some time thinking about that day, that vacation, whatever it might be.
          Then, write about it. Write it like a story. Think 4th grade writing assignment where you use all of your best descriptive words, etc. Start with “My best memory was….” and make a potential reader feel like they are there with you. Talk about the people that were there with you, and how they made you feel. Describe the surroundings. Write as much as you can.
         For those who love writing assignments, go ahead! Do a rough draft and a re-write! For those who love drawing, add illustration! If you have this ability, you should use it whenever you can! (Those of us who can’t draw a straight line are jealous of you.)
         For those who hate writing, just make sure you get the most important parts down. What are the most important parts, you ask? It’s whatever it was, that makes it the such a special memory.

        Now, part two: Make a copy. Or three. Or ten. Because you need to give a copy to every person in your story. If it’s someone who lives with you, you can give it to them however you’d like (with a note of explanation, or not). If it’s your young children, read it to them! How much will they love knowing they’re part of your best memory?! If they don’t live with you, mail it to them (again, with a note of explanation, or not).

Happy writing!

Well, it’s safe to say that those who know me know that I am rarely at a loss for words when it comes to the written word.

Truth be told, however, this one tripped me up a bit.  I didn’t exactly follow the rules.
  
As I think back on the last couple of years, no single moment came to mind as being more favorite than the rest.  So, I started thinking…which I tend to do…about why I couldn’t pinpoint that single moment.  My first thought was that, respectively, compared to years past, my life has been pretty uneventful, but I truly had to disregard that because my life is full of amazing moments everyday. 

Stop. 

Re-read. 

I said amazing.  Not perfect.  But the poignant ones…the deepest-felt moments of ordinary, of joy, of heartache, of shitty, of pride that I experience with my kindred spirits (sorry, couldn’t help the Anne Shirley reference)…all combine to form this favorite life of mine.  Not perfect, but favorite. 

I was sharing with my niece not long ago, and then with my sister-in-law a few weeks later, that I feel as I grow older, I am cutting ties a bit.  I am safeguarding my time and my soul more.  My niece had asked me who my “people” are these days, and I offered to her that I feel like I have really honed in on people who are real to me, meaning people who are not afraid to expose the imperfect while also celebrating the joys.  I don’t have time or strength to pretend to be perfect or to pretend that my kids are perfect or my life or my job or my marriage is perfect.  But I deeply value those who understand that though none of it is perfect, it is my favorite.  I am still learning that I love my times of heartache as much as my times of joy because they teach me so much about the power of the human spirit, our power to be there for one another and with one another, and our capacity to grow and learn and evolve from our mistakes and our misfortunes.

So…my favorite moment is not a moment, but a constellation of moments with incredible people which make my life what it is.  It is a deep feeling I have in my heart for each and every person in my life who allows me to be real and loves me despite this.  I can’t cover them all….but…

To my Bill…who gets the biggest dose of the real me and is still here after 15+ years.  My life simply would not be my favorite without you.  To my kids—my amazing (Stop.  Re-read.  I said amazing.  Not perfect.) littles who make my daily moments my favorites.  To my parents, who welcomed me into this world 39 years ago and haven’t given up on me yet.  To my “person” Wendy--the person who will always be my person.  To my extended family members who have become friends alike.   To my coworkers who accept my full-on sarcasm, make me laugh everyday, and make my job my favorite.  To all of my friends who are really my friends because we talk about more than the weather or our schedules or how amazing our kids are.   And to those people, near and far, past or present, with whom I have been connected for a long or short while, who have challenged me to grow and learn and evolve and be grateful for all of my moments—the amazing and the ugly.  You maybe don’t realize you are one of them, but the feeling of gratefulness in my heart tells me differently.    

You make my life my favorite.